Weight Watchers

So, are you fat...or just pregnant again?

After hearing this in Croatian I had two questions for the recipient (my wife) of this comment:

     A. Is that really what she said?!?

     B. How did you manage to keep your composure?!?

Disclaimer: This blog is called "Culture Shock" not "Generalize Croatia".  Many, many, many people would not make a comment like this to my wife.  

On the other hand, let me tell you two reasons why there is a greater chance Petra will hear this question again in Croatia rather than in America (besides the fact that we don't live in America):

1. Eastern Europeans often tell it like it is.  I've gained more weight during Petra's 3rd pregnancy than she has.  And if  it weren't for some of my friends, I really wouldn't have known.  I saw a mother publicly rub her daughter's belly the other day and tell a bunch of people how her daughter had been gaining weight.  It didn't seem to phase anyone within earshot - except me.  From what I can tell, the mentality is that if you can see it, why not comment on it?  While certainly not flattered by such a comment, Petra's used to it.  Simply put, if you gain weight in Croatia, you'll hear about it.  On the positive side, it's not that big a deal - people just aren't as sensitive about their weight.

2. While being pregnant for the 3rd time within 4 years is not the norm in the States, it's absolutely unheard of here (unless you belong to the Roma community).  There's a good chance the person asking the question was being more critical of Petra's pregnancy than her weight gain.  But that's the reason Petra didn't get nasty - she's happy to be pregnant again and as far as pregnancies go, she's done very well throughout the first 2 and-a-half.  In fact, as we look back we realized the other day that since her pregnancy with Enoh (our first) she's been pregnant more of the time than not.  Some have called her brave, others - crazy.  The fact is she couldn't be happier.

So go ahead, make the weight comments.  It's just the latest item on the long list of things I'm no longer shocked by.