Culture Shock

It wasn't my first Croatian funeral, but it was close.  I hadn't even been to that many American funerals, nor had I played solo trombone at a cemetary before.  So this was a new experience.  After warming up with  Amazing Grace to begin the ceremony, I waited for the small village procession to move towards the grave that had been prepared a few minutes beforehand.  Like most outdoor funerals I've attended, this one was overcast, muddy and generally dreary.  The blacks, browns and grays made the event especially dismal.  We trodded over to the tomb in a sloppy line and listened to the preacher speak.  His tone was pointed, but hopeful, his message short but clear - a stark contrast to the rest of the funeral.  It was my turn again.  As I raised my trombone to begin It is Well with my Soul , I heard yelling in the distance.  I hesitated, but still began the melody.  When peace like a river...

I mentioned in my introduction that one of the aspects of culture shock I would be facing would be that of having a child.  Two and a half years later, that child is, well, two and-a-half years old and we have another one-year-old.  I have made the following observation: The amount of time one has to blog is directly influenced by the number of kids one has.  It's a plain and simple truth that I've found to be true on other blogs as well.  To my followers; thank you for your patience.  There is more to come.  I will keep updating.  Just not as often as I used to.

In Croatia, you rarely see someone enjoying coffee over a book, magazine or computer like you often see in the States. One of the classic scenes in a relational culture is a coffee shop filled with people on both sides of the table.  And it's not like everyone in America just goes out for a latte by themselves.  In fact, I would guess that most Starbucks coffee shops are frequented by pairs rather than singles.  But it's certainly not as universal as Eastern Europe.  For the last month, I've been taking a class and I'll tell you, for my money, there's no better place to study than a coffee shop.  Some may say there's too much noise, but headphones and music will take care of that.  Features like free refills, wi-fi and a close outlet for my laptop are easy to find.  Still other comforts like a fireplace and an assortment of different coffees and signs indicating when they were brewed are also common - especially at my favor...

It must have been the summer of '95 when baseball cards were overproduced and my best friend and I waited breathlessly for the Beckett price guide to arrive in the mail the first week of every month.  It must have been, because I can't remember another time we would've risked getting soaked and having our bike-rides severely affected by slippery streets in order to buy a pack of the new Topps Stadium Club at a department store more than a mile away.  I remember it well because I had never been afraid of lightning before.  But as we anticipated the last corner of the ride and slowed down just enough to make the turn without skidding out, I felt a sizzling sensation as the hair on my neck stood up.  SNAP!  It wasn't a boom or a bang.  It was a sharp crackle that quickly exploded right next to me.  A flagpole - within an arms length as I passed by - had just been struck by lightning. Even though I hadn't been hit, the feeling paralyzed me...

During our time in the States, we've had the privilege of hosting one of our friends from Croatia.  It's her first time in the U.S. so I was fascinated to find out what she would notice about the Land that "was made for you and me".  Would it be how big everything is?  Would she notice the cars, the billboards, the differences in the milk?  Well, yes, yes, yes and yes.  But her very first observation was of how Americans build their houses.  "They're so thin!"  She exclaimed after knocking on the wall at a Friendly's restaurant.  The comment reminded me of the Three Little Pigs.  Isn't it interesting that one of the most popular stories we tell our children exhorts us to build with brick?  Yet, I would guess that most houses in America are made of wood. Croatians - and I would guess most Europeans - have heeded the advice offered by the conclusion of the story.  The vast majority of houses in Croatia are made of br...

After a holiday hiatus, I have to get back in the blogging game.  And there's no better way to do so than to rely heavily on one of my favorite Op Ed columnists - David Brooks .  In his latest piece he reviews a book called "All Things Shining".  He highlights several parts of the book, but let me cut to the chase.  Brooks paraphrases authors Hubert Dreyfus of Berkeley and Sean Dorrance Kelly of Harvard when he says this: The most real things in life well up and take us over. They call this experience “whooshing up.” We get whooshed up at a sports arena, at a political rally or even at magical moments while woodworking or walking through nature. He then goes on to dismiss some of the conclusions these two philosophers come to, but zeroes in on something that grabbed my attention: We have official stories we tell about our culture: each individual is the captain of his own ship; we are all children of God. But in practice, willy-nilly, the way we actually...

Turning two - and having a child that turns two - can be shocking.  Although I've done the former, I can do a better job of reporting on the latter.  Let me give you some adjectives to describe the culture shock that has accompanied Enoh's transition into the twos. 1. Terrible .  Don't stop here!  It's not that bad.  But sometimes you just have those instances, like the one below, where you wonder what got into your kid.  For those of you who received our Christmas card this year, this was the scene 10 minutes before the family picture was taken.   Yep, it can be terrible, but those moments only last for a...moment.  2. Turbulent.   This is the one my wife prefers to terrible.  And I get it.  The life of a parent of a two-year-old is a plane ride over the Icelandic volcano - up, down and all around.  You just never know what response you'll get to a "no" or which parent, grandparent, or stranger they'll prefer over yo...